Entry #27

October 27'th, Saturday

Breakfast at Baba's was mushrooms. It seems I'm eating the same things as when I'm on the road; apples and Scarlet Hood mushrooms. My Grandmother is actually poor despite her fearsome outlook on life. I wondered about how my mother was/is a 'Queen', and she seemed not to be, it just didn't make sense. So when I asked her she reluctantly answered that she simply made herself one. The card soldiers and castle whatnot are all fabricated from her magic. My mother is a witch. My Grandmother is a witch. I come from a long line of witches. I am a witch myself. "Witches of Flame" Baba said. Obviously a current of questions followed, where I ultimately asked about Bridget.
"Bridget is your cousin, not your sister. She holds a different sort of magic" She said.
It was silent for a second, "But then who's her mother?" I asked.
The pretty blond Fairy-Godmother looked guilty.
"You!" I cried.
She later explained that she did not have time to raise a daughter, no matter how much she wanted to, and that she didn't think witchery would be a good way to bring her up. I don't know what to think about all this. Except, that my aunt did indeed have blond hair like 'Goldilocks', though it wasn't curly. I have the same red hair as my mother.

"What does 'Witches of Flame" mean?" I asked.
"Enough with your questions! Every one makes me age a year." I took a look at Baba's ashen face, and to my surprise, it really did look older than it was. Aqua(my aunt) hurried inside the house and later brought out some Blue Rose Tea. When Baba sipped it, she relaxed in her chair and looked younger again. "Why is your time limited like that?" I asked.
"Another question, but alright." She said looking relaxed. "Witches are immortal. There are certain ways you can kill them, but usually they live on infinitely."(I wanted to ask a question here, but she stopped me) "But because the world needs a balance, a system was brought in. Certain things make us age, and only certain things can reverse that process. Like questions and tea, with myself." She took another sip of her tea. She took a look at my questioning face "Yes, you are immortal Anne, I dare say you've been alive longer than you've thought you have. And no, the Gingerbread witch you defeated was not from a true witch line, therefore you could kill her. Yes, the certain thing that ages us can kill us eventually, but only when it ages you to an extent you can't use magic. And no, the 'certain thing' that ages and changes us back is not the same as mine. Every witches is different, so you will have to find it out for yourself. A witch starts using magic when she has already died once, therefore she is immortal. The thing that kills her is usually the thing that reverses the age process, so yes, Anne, you have already died." I can only imagine what my face looked like at that moment. "Try to remember Anne, what was the thing that killed you?"

I couldn't remember. I excused myself from the outside tea table, and tried to take a nap (as that usually helps me when I'm overwhelmed and bad things reveal themselves) but I couldn't fall asleep. So I just laid there until dusk came, staring up at the ceiling. I'm immortal? I'm already dead? I'm a witch? This is all just a jumble in my head, and it all creates a black hole in my stomach that swirls around uncomfortably. When I finally crept out of my borrowed bedroom, I heard voices in the garden coming in from the open window. It was Fenrir and Baba.
"Never thought I'd see you again." Baba.
"Nor did I wish to." Fenrir.
Baba: "Is that spell working the way it should?"
Fenrir: "Yes, but the transformation is bothersome. The Ribbon is still attached, though I can move around. My powers are hindered with it still there."
Baba: "Serves you right, giving in to a deal like that. If I was such an idiot, I would've killed myself! Have you found a way to remove it completely?"
Fenrir: "No, as you have seen."
Baba: "But I see you have made an attempt to. You're the one that killed her aren't you, Anne I mean."
Silence.
Baba: "You thought that if you ate her, you could consume her undeveloped fire power and burn the Ribbon off completely."
Fenrir: "....It didn't work out that way."
Baba: "Yes, yes, I know. You didn't eat her. But why decide that after you already killed her?"

I couldn't listen anymore.

Running back to the bedroom, I grabbed my bow and arrows, everything else I owned, and ran out the back door. They didn't see me go. I ran as far as I could into the wood, and finally collapsed onto the grass of a meadow. It was dark by that time. I was a mess; snobby nose running all over, mixing with my field of tears. I just sat there crying for a time. I don't know what to do anymore. Everything is a mix up. I thought I could trust Fenrir. But it turns out I can't trust anyone, not even my own mother. He killed me. When, how? I didn't even notice. How stupid am I? Not to even notice that I was already dead. I really am all alone in this world. The tears of the moon are the stars.